On October 7, Laurie Santos, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at Yale University, an expert in the science of happiness, and podcast host of The Happiness Lab, spent the day with the Nobles community. Dr. Santos is the creator of Yale’s most popular course of all time: Psychology and the Good Life. Nobles’ Director of Counseling and Psychology Jen Hamilton and her team have partnered with Dr. Santos to teach the course at Nobles over the past few years.
If you look at the positive psychology literature, one of the hugest effects on our own happiness is our social connection … Social relationships and strong social relationships are necessary for happiness..
In Assembly, Dr. Santos spoke about the importance of mental health and happiness in facing life’s many challenges, emphasizing that negative emotions are normative and should not be suppressed. Instead, Dr. Santos suggested engaging in self-compassion, social connection, and physical activity to manage these feelings. When we address our own well-being, we can contribute positively to the world.
Dr. Santos also hosted a session for parents and guardians, outlining five insights from the science of well-being specific to raising young people:
- Happiness matters for performance. A positive mood affects productivity and creativity.
- If we really want children to both perform better and feel better, we need to allow them to seek the “right” kind of rewards—extrinsic rewards undermine intrinsic rewards. Embrace more play and time off.
- Encourage and support your teen’s healthy failure. Do not fix things for them—do not take over—because when this happens, children develop the belief that they are not capable of solving the problem on their own.
- Teach and model being in the present moment—savor experiences, limit technological distractions, and set digital boundaries. Embrace collaborative problem-solving with your child by creating strategies around phone use as a family.
- Find healthy ways to help children navigate negative emotions. Discourage them from suppressing their emotions. Use the RAIN method: Recognize, Allow, Investigate, and Nurture.